7 Simple Things That Keep Love Alive After Marriage (What Many Couples Forget)

Introduction

Marriage is beautiful, but let’s be honest - keeping love alive requires intention. Not stress, not pressure, not perfection… just intention.

Most couples don’t lose love because of a single big mistake; love fades slowly when the little things that used to matter are forgotten.

**We forget to hold hands like we used to.

**We forget to check on each other like we once did.

**We forget to pray together.

**We forget to appreciate.

And without knowing it, the marriage begins to feel like two roommates instead of two lovers.

To show how small things matter, let me begin with a story

 A SHORT STORY TO OPEN YOUR HEART

Chiamaka and Daniel were known as “the perfect couple” when they got married.

They laughed easily, held hands everywhere, prayed before sleeping, and even wrote small notes to each other. But after six years of marriage, things changed.

**Daniel became busy with work.

**Chiamaka became busy with the kids.

**Communication became short… rushed… empty.

**The house had love, but not connection.

One evening, Chiamaka found a small diary Daniel used years ago.

Inside, she saw a page where he wrote:

**“I love how she smiles at me when I come home.”

**“I love the way she puts her head on my chest when she’s tired.”

**“I love how we talk about our dreams till midnight.”

She realized - they stopped doing all those things.

They didn’t stop loving each other…

They just stopped watering their love.

That night, Chiamaka decided to revive the little things.

The next morning, she placed a small note in Daniel’s wallet:

“Thank you for working so hard for our family. I appreciate you.”

That one note softened Daniel’s heart instantly.

He came home early that day.

He hugged her longer.

He talked more.

He smiled more.

Little things…

Simple things…

That’s what brought their love back to life.

Marriage doesn’t need magic. It needs intention.

Here are 7 simple things many couples forget — yet they make all the difference.

1. Consistent, Heartfelt Communication

Talking daily is not the same as communicating. Many couples talk, but they don’t connect. “How was your day?” “Fine.” “What did you eat?” “Rice.”

These are not conversations.

Real communication is when you share your thoughts, feelings, disappointments, dreams, and fears.

DON’T FORGET:

Communication is not about replying fast; it’s about understanding deeply.

Marriage grows stronger when couples communicate openly and honestly.

📖 “Two are better than one… if either of them falls, one can help the other up.” — Ecclesiastes 4:9

2. Appreciation and Compliments

One of the biggest killers of marriage is taking each other for granted.

Before marriage, you said: “You look beautiful today.” “I’m proud of you.”

“I’m blessed to have you.”

After marriage, many couples stop complimenting each other.

But the truth is:

What you stop appreciating will slowly stop flourishing.

A simple “thank you” can repair a tired heart.

A small compliment can revive intimacy.

SAY THIS OFTEN:

“I noticed what you did. Thank you.”

📖 “Encourage one another and build each other up…” — 1 Thessalonians 5:11

3. Spending Quality Time (Even 20 Minutes Counts)

Marriage dies when couples stop spending time together.

Not planned outings…

Not expensive dates…

Just simple, undistracted time.

Phone down.

TV off.

Heart open.

Talk.

Laugh.

Pray.

Sit close.

Share dreams.

Quality time = emotional bonding.

📖 “Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” — Matthew 6:21

4. Small Surprises (The Heart Warmers)

People think surprises must be expensive.

Not at all.

A note.

Her favourite snack.

A warm hug from behind.

A simple “I miss you.”

Small surprises show that you are still thinking about your partner.

They revive sweetness.

They restore excitement.

They bring back the spark.

Every love grows where effort lives.

5. Physical Touch (A Love Language Many Forget)

Touch is a powerful form of connection.

Hold hands.

Sit close.

Cuddle.

Touch the shoulder.

Hug from behind.

Kiss on the forehead.

Marriages where couples still touch each other tenderly rarely grow cold.

Do not underestimate the healing power of gentle touch.

📖 “Greet one another with a holy kiss.” — 2 Corinthians 13:12

6. Praying Together

A couple that prays together builds spiritual intimacy — and spiritual intimacy strengthens emotional intimacy.

**Prayer brings peace.

**It removes silent resentment.

**It softens the heart.

**It unites the spirit.

Marriage is not only emotional; it is spiritual.

Even if it’s just 2 minutes:

Hold hands and pray.

📖 “A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” — Ecclesiastes 4:12

7. Intentionally Saying “I Love You”

Many couples stop saying it intentionally.

But love needs to be spoken, heard, and repeated.

Say it in the morning.

Say it in the evening.

Say it even when you’re tired.

Say it when you are angry.

The heart needs reminders.

“I love you” is not cliché — it is fuel.

 Reflection

Love doesn’t die suddenly.

It fades slowly when the small, meaningful habits are no longer there.

Your marriage does not need expensive gifts, loud gestures, or dramatic changes.

It just needs:

One prayer.

One touch.

One compliment.

One listening ear.

One note.

One kiss.

One intentional moment.

Start today.

Choose one of the seven things and do it before the day ends.

Love grows when you water it.

🙏 A Short Prayer for Your Marriage

“Lord, teach us to love intentionally.

Restore what routine tried to steal.

Help us appreciate each other deeply.

Strengthen our bond, soften our hearts, and keep our love alive.

Amen.”

If this blessed you, share it with a friend or a couple who needs encouragement.

And don’t forget to follow the blog for more faith-based marriage and relationship guides.

Chinyere Inspires